By Scott Reddoch
It was the morning after having the first stroke. She spent her birthday by my bedside but she didn’t say a word about her special day. We were just enjoying the fact that I was still alive.
We don’t have the voice to say it. I don’t speak for the group but I’m sure no one will mind me saying this. Thank you caregivers. I certainly wouldn’t be writing this if it weren’t for mine.
She has been with me since that dreadful night that started all of this. We had never heard of locked in syndrome. When I was given a 10% chance to survive she was there. When I began to have breathing complications that should have been my end she was there. When I developed a pressure sore so bad that most thought I would die she was there. When I developed sepsis so bad I thought I would die she was there. When it came time to send me to a long term facility she was there and said no. I will take him home.
She didn’t have a medical background or know how she would do it. But my mom wasn’t going to let anyone take me.
Her name is Vickie.
Every day her, my dad and my sister hoist me from bed to my chair. I can’t swallow so all meds and food are via a feeding tube. Being paralyzed and non-verbal I require assistance for everything. She says that I’m easy and not a burden. I’m glad she feels that way but I don’t. She has put her own health at risk to care for me. I know that’s something moms do but it can be hard to watch.
This wasn’t a hold your hand and hope for the better kind of situation. She was holding whatever staff was caring for me to that staff doing their jobs. I didn’t think you needed to do that in healthcare.
Look at what caregiving actually entails. Someone gave up their normal life to ensure your needs are met. You don’t just find that anywhere. It requires great sacrifice. Beside taking care of my needs my mom is also a wife, sister, friend and aunt. That’s a lot to juggle. She doesn’t have much help so most of her day is spent tending to me.
We have brief conversations and I know she is always in my corner. I can rest easy knowing that. She knows that I am appreciative but probably not how much. I couldn’t do this without her. If it was left up to the hospital staff I would have surely died.
That’s a big deal.
Thank you.
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